-after all I'm still a jerk playing with matches..

Ever since I looked at those old emails/pictures it made me start wondering what ever happen to my friendship with all those people. I have been missing those few people the last couple days and its weird for me to think that i haven't had a decent conversation with those few people that i grew up with.I miss them, i really do.. i miss their intelligent conversations about bands ive never even heard of and stupid little facts of life that at the time i didnt care about but looking back they were hilarious! I miss laughing with those people so much, its actually depressing me tonight. It made me wonder if when im done high school how many people i will actually still talk to.. and how many people will actually remember me, it makes me depressed to think that i could just be another face in the crowd. I had a dream last night that i went to my 10 year reunion and yeah my group of friends remembered me, but people i grew up with & hung out with in elementary school didn't. It made me extremely depressed that i am no longer considered a friend to them, that i am just another person they pass in the hallway. I want to change that, i want to look back on my high school life and know that i was friends with every possible person that i could be friends with. I want to actually live my life to it's full potential because ive seen too many people lose their lives too early. Thats my depressing entry , talk to you soon world - smuggy smug smug